Why Marry? A commitment of the heart with Vows and Promises

The decision to get married is an important one. Other than deciding to have a child, it’s probably the most life altering important decision we make in life. Marriage is not necessary for everyone but for David and I, it felt like a necessary next step. We could have continued living life as a married couple without having a ceremony but for both of us, a ceremony represented the commitment of our heart, not just our minds intentions. It was the opportunity to put a voice to what our heart was willing to promise.

We wrote our vows as a living document, a start, something to be reviewed on a regular basis, something to discuss and support each other in what areas we are challenged with. We chose to marry on March 19, the date of the Equinox in Bora Bora as a significant date where both yin and yang energy or feminine and masculine are at a crossing point and most connected. This energy defines where we are at in this moment and recognizes that we are both constantly changing and growing as we evolve ourselves and our relationship. We started our day with a meditation by the sea, consciously connecting each of our chakras, weaving them together and we were finished we heard each other’s vows for the first time in a private moment before the actual ceremony.

These vows are not for everyone, they are ours. They speak to where we are at this particular time in our life. They are the sacred voice of our heart and ask that they be read with that in mind.

My Beautiful, Wonderful, Darling Lindsay,

The morning has arrived, it’s the March Equinox and our Wedding Day. Here we are on what is said to be one of the most beautiful small islands in the World, never mind the South Pacific, Bora Bora surrounded by its unbelievable turquoise ocean and ocean life.

WOW!! What a place, I can’t think of a more special place in the world to marry and exchange vows with the love of my life, my lover, my soulmate, my very, very best friend and now I’m very proud to say my wife.

From the moment our paths crossed, I knew that someone really special had walked into my life. From the first moment we met looking into those beautiful blue eyes and that amazing smile I felt my heart skip several beats. To our Italian engagement in the hill town of San Gimignano, remembering that I couldn’t wait to place that beautiful ring on that special finger on the most wonderful being in the world.

Today we’re here on this beautiful morning to complement that beautiful ring with a wedding band full of diamonds that match the sparkle in your eyes that will be with you for an eternity.

I look back over time and can’t believe how much I love you and how much my love for you has grown for you. My heart aches when we’re apart and I count the days and hours till we’re back together and in each other’s arms. I feel so blessed to have you in my life along with all the new experiences that we have shared together and all the new ones to come.


I promise I will look after you and be by your side in both sickness and health.

I promise I’ll laugh with you in times of joy and comfort you in times of sorrow.

I promise I’ll be there to support you through your dreams and be there to support you should they ever fall apart.

I promise I’ll be there to listen and understand what you say.

I promise to love you for ever and ever my love.

I still remember as if it was yesterday the first moment we met, looking into those beautiful blue eyes, feeling the warmth of holding hands.

I think of all the things WE can do and accomplish as one and how much fun it can be.

I want to dream with you my darling and explore all that the world and the countries it has to offer us both.

I would be honoured if you would be my partner on this journey through life and be my wife for the rest of our lives.

My Beloved David,

Where do I start? Where do we start? We can pick a date – the first date, the first kiss, the first phone call, the first email, the first message or the moment we hit that key on the keyboard, but the reality is that we both started long before that.

We have both lived a life full of joy and struggles. We have faced challenges and made difficult decisions bringing us to this day.

As much as we have both proven to our family, our friends and ourselves that we can live quite successfully on our own, we both knew there was something missing in our life. That piece that takes us into our deepest state of vulnerability and at the same time, that sense of immense joy and intense fear that leaves one breathless as your heart is cracked wide open.

I felt this pull with the very first connection. I fell into my old patterns of resisting and making up stories as to why this shouldn’t be – the distance, age, health – the list could go on. And then in one brief moment, shortly after our first weekend together, I was faced with the possibility that I may never see you again. I knew in that moment that I would give everything I had to be with you to the very end; that it didn’t matter where we were or what we did but I wanted to hold you and be by your side making every breath you take easier, more peaceful and find our way into a love that we both only dreamed possible – a love that takes our breath away every single day.

We both know that what we share is not to be taken for granted, that love and relationships require constant attention and for both people to participate in a fully conscious way. It is this journey that I am committing to you today.

I cannot promise you an end to a journey that I do not know but I will promise to love you with everything I have in me and to communicate with you especially when I’m not wanting to or afraid to.

I promise to be fully present with you, listening beyond your words.

I promise to be your strength when you are feeling weak.

I promise to never assume that I know you but rather continue to witness and see all of you in all that you offer me and our families.

I promise to be true to who I am, to live authentically me, remembering that it is that woman that you fell in love with.

I promise to hold space for you to find your own truths and live your authentic life. I will support you when those answers are not easy and love you through the difficult times.

I promise to always put “us” ahead of myself and to never doubt that you will do the same.

I promise to take you on a journey into our hearts, no matter how much work it might seem. I promise to make the journey a safe one, a sacred one, which allows our love to grow deeper with every day.

I love you David. With all of my being I want to be with you in all life offers us.

I want to be your life partner, your wife and promise to always be your girlfriend, the woman you dated and courted.

As much as we met less than two years ago, we have been separately preparing for this journey for what seems like life times. I can’t wait to see where we go from here. Here’s to another thousand years!

I love you.

David Andrew Shea, as a token of my love, I give you my heart and this ring as a symbol of our love and my commitment to you.


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